Dealing with a Marriage Gone Bad and Children
Life doesn’t always go as intended and we need to make challenging decisions at certain points. Though you do everything you can for your marriage, for example, it may still fail. These things can be impossible to control. If your marriage has begun to take away your self-esteem or your peace of mind, then you need to think your relationship over. To get a divorce or not is a big decision, especially with children in the picture. Before you actually decide, here are issues to take into account:
Talk to your spouse.
You may feel utterly uncomfortable talking to your spouse, but it’s a must. Initiate an adult and relaxed conversation regarding your available options and how you can make your marriage better.
Be honest to yourself.
By being honest to yourself, you can ensure that the cause you are fighting for might actually work for you. Of course, this largely depends on your spouse’ own feelings. If he is also keen on saving your relationship, then there is hope.
Don’t stop trying.
It is highly advised that you continue trying and don’t give up unless you totally can’t swallow it anymore. Explore new ways to improve your marriage, such as seeking marriage therapy. You might just discover a deeply rooted issue and fix it for good. Unless you talk about how you feel, there is no possibility of saving your marriage.
Make a decision and stick to it.
At a specific point, you will actually have to decide and just go with such decision. Ensure that you are completely comfortable with such a decision, and stick to your guns. Divorce can be crushing, but nothing is worse than going back and forth with your partner while your kids watch. It’s will be challenging, but if divorce appears to be the best decision, have the courage to stand by it.
Talk to the kids on their level.
Divorce can take a big toll on kids, especially if they are adjusting to other changes in their own lives too. The best thing to do is talk to them in a way they would understand. If you are thinking of sharing custody, establish a routine that brings the least disruption to them. In any case, provide reassurance that both of their parents love them unconditionally, regardless of what happens.
A divorce or rocky marriage can be heartbreaking, but you must maintain positivity and focus on instead on all the beautiful things going on in other aspects of your life. Look forward to the future and be careful not to lose yourself in the process; in the end, you will emerge a stronger and wiser version of yourself.